No wonder that majority of students cannot get job, cannot create any software, do nothing on their own. They go to IT service companies like Infosys, TCS, Accenture, Cognizant and think they have great career while actual Software companies like Oracle, Google, Microsoft never hire them for any programming work which pay 10 times compared to service companies along with respect, value and benefits.
All the incidents are selected from an answer on quora.
Me: Sir, how could it be wrong? It prints the exact output required!!!
Prof: But your code is only 6 lines long. The correct code is about 25 lines. Refer to the manual.
Me: But sir, what has the length of code got to do with its correctness? My code prints the exact output required.
Prof: Do you know how long I have been teaching here? 25 years. Do you think you are the first student trying to trick me? The correct code has 5 for loops. Your code has only 2. Don’t try to act over smart with me . Now get out before I deduct 2 more marks from your total.
As my college is a typical government college, It so happens that some of the professors were appointed by unconventional methods (read corruption/source). How do I know? Well, these professors have zero knowledge about computers. ZERO. Actually, if the world was fair, these professors would not even have qualified to be sweepers.
One such professor is very high up in the hierarchy of Computer Department. He is famous for spouting the most idiotic shit whenever he opens his mouth.
Here are a few of his ultra stupid quotes, that have since become legend in my college –
1) A group went to him to show him a website they had built. As they begun with the demo, the website would not open. They tried and tried but they could not.
Prof (smirking): “Kya hua bachho, kuch problem hai?” (What’s the matter?)
Students: “Sir pata nahi par localhost ki vajah se kuch problem aa rahi hai.” (Sir there is some issue with localhost)
Prof (in authoritative tone): “Kon hai ye localhost. Bula ke lao ise mere paas. I’ll teach him a lesson.” (Who is this localhost. Go and fetch him. I’ll teach him a lesson)
He thought that localhost was some person – Local Host!!!
2) One day, he started discussing with a group of students the condition of computer labs in the department.
He : “Mere paas ek achha idea hai. Ham log apne labs ke saare computers me windows 8 daal dete hain. Fir hamare computers bhi touchscreen ho jayenge.” (I’ve got a brilliant idea. Let’s install Windows 8 in all computers of our lab. Then, all our computers will become touchscreen.)
Sounds too stupid to be true. But unfortunately, it is.
You’ll get one software company for every 10 BPO which visits the campus. I was among the first to get placed, in HCL Tech. And they accepted 7 students out of thousands.
No one knows anything about coding. I was implementing a DFS in my second year, asked a PhD scholar for help. He said “This is too advanced, try web designing. HTML has more scope.”
Labs are even more fun. I’m yet to do anything of worth. Like many of the other answers, we still use the TurboC/Notepad combo for C++/Java. I had installed NP++ on my machine. And when an output was a bit off, the ma’am was “Don’t be over smart, I know more than you. Use original C++” Yea, she thought TurboC was “original” C++, and I was programming in something else.
The class topper in my section, when asked the difference between open-source and commercial software in an interview, answered “Open Source is much more difficult to install when compared to commercial software. Eg: Linux more difficult than Windows 7”. She was asked to leave the room immediately.
I was asked by a graduated senior, if it was possible to download Wi-fi onto her laptop from another one. She didn’t want something FROM the wi-fi, she wanted to download the Wi-fi, because her laptop did not have it.
I was not allowed to write an exam, because I had dues of Rs.9 which I had to pay at the bank outside the campus. I did write it finally after drawing in my brother’s name and designation, which I dislike.
During the final year project viva, a classmate was asked a particularly tough question about his project. He was “I’m sorry, I bought this project” and he got 5 marks for being truthful.
Teacher: So, this is binary search.
Me: But ma’am, we can also use a while loop instead of recursion. Recursion causes stack overhead and stuff.
Teacher: Aap hi aake kyun nai sikha dete yaha pe? (Translation: Why don’t you come here and teach?).
Me: Ma’am I was just saying there is an alternative way to do it.
Teacher: Haan haan sab tumhe hi aata hai na? Hum to bevkoof hai yaha pe! (Translation: Only you know everything right? We are idiots standing here!)
We were using TurboC for C programming. I was bored by some writing problems (I had some prior programming experience). So I decided to change the color of screen. So I changed to red instead of Blue. Ma’m came near to me and told me that “Aapko kuchh nahi ata. Itni sari errors fir age kya karoge” (You don’t know anything. You got so much errors how can you do further programming). This was because I changed screen color to red and she thought that it was full of errors.
A student wasn’t able to find the bug in the code he had written, he asked a teacher in the lab for help. She sat with him and checked the code, after a while she opened the book and verified if the code written by the student was same. She asked him to make changes to the code as it was in the book. Even then there were errors. What she said next surprised me “All your code is exactly the same, but its still not working. I think its because of the comments. Rewrite the comments as they are in the book and lets see.”
In one such test, I had written a program with my own logic and teacher had marked it as wrong. I asked her why and I explained her that I can execute this code to give proper results. She says “There are so many students in the class, if everyone writes with their own logic, how will I be able to verify, you should write it exactly the way its given in the text book.”
Once, the executed code was running in infinite loop and I wasn’t able to figure out why. I asked a teacher in my lab to review the code and debug. He stares at the code for a while and gives an awesome suggestion, “There is a break statement in the loop, it is put in an if condition, remove the if condition. ”
2 of the deans of IT department were operating a computer. The browser showed “Get Free CD” ad. One guy clicked on it in hope of getting the CD. Then he opened the disk drive to check if the CD came. Seeing that there was no disk there, he asked the other guy : “Why Sir ? CD didnt come”
The other guy replied : ” Wait man !! Its coming from US. Will take sometime”
Why do we use log(n)? Where did that come from ?” (because we were told to memorize the running time of the different algorithms and were not taught how to derive it).
Professor(mocking to hide his ignorance)-“That you will have to ask the mathematician who invented it.”
Once I have written a c program in which I was passing triple pointer (***ptr). instructor was very afraid that this would not work in linux, one should not pass triple pointer.
Once in practical exam internal examiner said that you are using linux because you want to use pen drive, you are cheating.
One instructor told me that no one does their final year project in C or C++ it is outdated. everyone does it in Java. (How could she forget that the OS she was using is totally built in C/C++. She thinks there is nothing beyond Turbo C)
In Sixth semester, while doing java lab, a mysterious new phenomenon took place in one of my friends system. Whatever the person types overwrites old content(you might already have figured out what happened). All the lab staff look terrified and since none of them was not confident with the way Java worked, fiinally system admin was called. Sysadmin who was new to job, came running to figure out this mysterious issue only to discover that the “insert” key was pressed accidentally by the student.
Me: Yes sir,How useful is the string concept in C language?
Teacher: Programs based on string are very important and are frequently asked in exams
This funny incident happened during my second year of B.Tech.
When my professor copies some c++ code from textbook to black board. Somewhere in the code there is a scope resolution operator(::). As I’m seeing that operator first time, I asked him how can I write that operator using keyboard?(Though I knew that I can write it by putting two colons side by side but to clarify myself I asked him).
He replied with an amazing answer to my question, i.e in his own words.
put a dot(.) on screen and followed by it put another dot(.), after that go to the next line and put an another dot(.) exactly below the first dot(.), and then followed by it put an another dot(.).
During that mean time the girl sitting next to me asked me to help. Her program was reversing of a given number, as the invigilation in our lab is very liberal myself coded her the entire program and tested with few inputs and told her that you can show it to the examiner now.
She called the examiner and showed the program to him and the examiner sends me and her to the viva together.
In viva the external asked her that, will your programming works fine with all inputs?(may be his intention was to know how she handled the numbers which ends with ‘0’).
In a flash of light she replied that, yes sir it’s working correctly for all inputs except the case that when I’m giving ‘6’ it was not giving ‘9’.
With that answer the examiner totally gone blank. (6 is 9 turned upside down)
Sort an array:
Ask user to enter data in sorted manner
Print that data
One of their professors once taught in class that there is absolutely no way in C to find the length of a string.
And when my friend told her about strlen( ) she was like “Oh really?……well, you shouldn’t use the library functions”.